Deirdre Imus and Lis Wiehl Debut 'Blonde on Blonde' with Talk of Sexting, Apologizing, and Smoking Pot

Deirdre Imus and Lis Wiehl kicked off their debut installment of Blonde on Blonde this week by picking a bone with the I-Man. Not a great sign.

Wiehl, a Fox News legal analyst, had done mounds of research on all sorts pressing issues to prepare for her weekly appearance with Deirdre, but was peeved about the segment’s title.

“We’re not just blondes,” she informed Imus, who does not “sext,” but teased his guest that he’s read the ones she writes to Geraldo.

“Sexting,” means sending sexually provocative e-mails or text messages, and Wiehl and Dierdre were outraged to learn that children engage in this sort of illicit behavior. But often, technology-obsessed parents are the ones teaching their kids bad habits.

“This is the first generation of kids that this is how they’re growing up,” Deirdre said, adding that between cell phones, Facebook, and computers, “It’s nonstop.”

Wiehl’s two children have cell phones, a decision she defended by saying, “What if they get stuck somewhere? What if they need a ride home? What if I’m in the city and, god forbid, something terrible happens?”

Deirdre chalked Wiehl’s mentality, and that of hordes of parents, up to remnants of post-9/11 anxiety. Imus was less tactful, telling Wiehl that her children using cell phones will cause them to get brain tumors.

“When their head glows and they’re shoving ice cream cones at their forehead, you won’t be laughing at the I-Man,” he said, unfortunately referring to himself not only in third person, but also as “the I-Man.”

A recent study showed that men have a higher threshold for bad behavior than women do, and are therefore less likely to apologize. Unless, of course, that woman is Deirdre Imus.

“You won’t apologize for behaviors you don’t like that you do yourself,” Imus told his wife. “For example, if you’re typing on your dopey computer and Wyatt or I interrupt you, you freak out.” Meanwhile, if Imus is on the phone or doing business on his computer, “She is not reluctant at all to butt in, and interrupt me, and never say, ‘excuse me.’”

In Deirdre’s defense, she’s often unsure the person on the other end of the line—usually Charles or Lupica—is even listening, given the substance of the conversation. “He goes into detail about his prostate, his throat, his toe,” she said. “And something you said you had on your butt.”

Maybe some of Imus’s ills could be cured with marijuana, which Californians could legalize if a statewide referendum called Proposition 19 passes in November. “It’s not going to happen,” Wiehl said, noting, “Federal law will always trump state law.”

Imus, for one, wouldn’t mind if it were legal. “I’d rather someone smoke dope than drink alcohol,” he said, adding that ideally, people would do neither.

And if Deirdre had it her way, they wouldn’t eat bagels, either. When Imus pretended to—oh my god—eat a bagel with cream cheese, she declared, “That would be like you putting a cigarette in your mouth.”

Tune in to next week’s Blonde on Blonde segment and find out what else Imus can’t eat, drink, or smoke! (Hint: it’s pretty much everything).

-Julie Kanfer