Jake Tapper is Our Guy (Just Don't Go On Too Long About Your Kid)

Imus's nomination to succeed George Stephanopoulos on ABC's Sunday morning news show This Week is none other than the network's esteemed White House Correspondent Jake Tapper.

"It's an honor to be nominated," said Tapper. "George did such a good job with that show."

Which Imus heard as: "I've already picked out my office, and I'll throw George out of the studio on live television this Sunday."

Imus will miss having ol' Stephanopoulos on this show, since his new morning duties on Good Morning America leave us sadly without his humor and insight. "They can't whoop on the Today show quick enough to suit me," said Imus.

Seizing an opportunity to bond with the I-Man, and Tapper shared a charming story about his and Stephanopoulos's young daughters. But Imus had lost interest, and told Tapper, "That's probably a lot more information than we needed."

Tapper said that President Obama's agenda today included two big things. First, he'd be issuing an order for the federal government to acquire a prison in rural Thomson, Ill., which would house Guantanamo Bay detainees.

"That's a big move, assuming Congress gives him the money to do that," said Tapper, citing some members' reluctance to host terrorists on American soil.

This afternoon, Obama will hold a meeting with all 60 Senate Democrats and those who caucus with them, which includes Independents Joe Lieberman and Bernie Sanders.

"He's going to tell them, 'This is it — if you don't pass health care reform now, it's never going to happen,'" said Tapper. As it stands, the public option looks dead because of Lieberman's stated unwillingness to vote for any plan in which it is included.

Imus giggled at Obama saying "knock on wood" — and then literally doing so — when talking about his economic policies during an interview with Oprah. But he's not the only superstitious politician: John McCain, said Tapper, carries with him "every rabbit's foot from here to Phoenix." Yeah, that's working really well for him.

In the same interview, Obama graded his performance thus far as a B-plus, which Tapper said might not have been the best response.

"A better answer might have been, 'I get an incomplete because my job's not done, the American people will give me the grade in three years,'" Tapper suggested.

Imus's grade for Tapper's five favorite songs, which include tunes by Stevie Wonder and Nirvana, was probably also around a B-plus. The noted absence of Bruce Springsteen from Taper's list was welcomed by all, but probably most by Lou.

-Julie Kanfer