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Deirdre's Corner

Don't forget to catch Deirdre on Blonde on Blonde, Wednesdays at 7:35am and Psychos, Thursday at 7:35am on Imus in the Morning! 
 

 

Let's Give 'Em Something to Buzz About: By Deirdre Imus, 8-23-2016 - There’s been a lot of buzz lately about honeybees, those quasi-nuisances that can send even the most stoic among us into a tailspin trying to avoid an encounter. And while a bee sting is undesirable, the pain you’ll feel then is nothing compared to the pain we’ll all feel – and soon – if we don’t do something to protect these sometimes petrifying pollinators. 

 Celebrating 15 Years Protecting Children's Health & the Environment

 The Deirdre Imus Environmental Health Center®  - When you are among the first voices to speak out on an issue, it’s difficult to know if anyone is listening. When I founded The Deirdre Imus Environmental Health Center® at Hackensack University Medical Center fifteen years ago, concern about our children's health being impacted by toxic exposures in the environment was not the hot button, trendy issue it is today.  Read more...

 

Deirdre's Dish Pick

 

Frances' Vegetable "Fried" Rice - Recipe by Deirdre Imus, The Imus Ranch: Cooking for Kids and Cowboys.  I recommend using all organic non GMO ingredients. Brown rice takes its name from the outer bran coating that is left intact rather than removed in milling, as it is in white rice.  Because of this, it is higher in fiber, vitamin B, and important minerals than white rice is.  It also takes a while longer to cook, but the delicious nutty flavor, as well as the additional nutritional value, make it worth the time.  The edamame in this dish also provides a good source of protein.

If you have a fond memory from your childhood about some of the dishes we post please click here to contact us, we would love to hear your story.

If you have a Healthy Recipe that you enjoy and would like to see others indulge in, please share it with us: Deirdre.Imus@hackensackmeridian.org - You may have your recipe posted live on my Recipe Page! 

Deirdre's Book Pick Of The Week

 

Anti-Inflammatory Eating Made Easy - by Dr. Oz, Michael Pollan, and Mark Bittman - With Anti-Inflammatory Eating Made Easy, eat as much as you want, lose weight, and heal your body. More and more people have become aware of the many benefits of an anti-inflammatory diet. Seattle nutritionist Michelle Babb has created an easy-to-follow nutrition plan and cookbook that helps readers combat inflammation with healthy recipes and food choices. Making dramatic lifestyle changes can be difficult, but the seventy-five recipes and nutrition plan in this book make that change approachable, understandable, sustainable, and delicious. Adopting an anti-inflammatory diet can help alleviate arthritis, type 2 diabetes, food allergies, skin conditions, weight gain, and many other symptoms of chronic inflammation.


    Support The Deirdre Imus Environmental Health Center

The Deirdre Imus Environmental Health Center® is devoted to the health and well-being of children, their parents and the general public. Donations to the Environmental Health Center will support research on children's environmental health.

 

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Inside Imus Control Center
The Imus Ranch Foundation

With the closing of The Imus Ranch For Kids with Cancer, The Imus Ranch Foundation was formed to donate 100% of all donations previously devoted to The Imus Ranch for Kids with Cancer to various other charities whose work and missions compliment those of the ranch. The initial donation from The Imus Ranch Foundation was awarded to Tackle Kids Cancer, a program of The HackensackUMC Foundation and the New York Giants.  In addition, once the Imus Ranch for Kids with Cancer is sold, 100% of those funds will be contributed to The Imus Ranch Foundation.

Warner's Sports Corner

New York wins first LLWS title for US since '11 - New York celebrates its first Little League World Series championship since 1964 with a 2-1 victory in the championship game over South Korea.

Baez's casual throw costs Cubs in 1-0 loss to Dodgers - Baez and Ben Zobrist failed to convert on a fielder's choice and allowed a run to score in the eighth inning, and Brock Stewart and four relievers combined to four-hit the Cubs in the Los Angeles Dodgers' 1-0 victory on Sunday.

Brock Osweiler solid in Texans' win over Cardinals -  Brock Osweiler threw for 146 yards and a touchdown and Houston intercepted two of Carson Palmer's passes in the Texans' 34-24 exhibition victory over the Arizona Cardinals on Sunday.

Fowler loses Ryder Cup spot at Barclays - Rickie Fowler falters lake to fall just short of automatic Ryder Cup spot.

Recent Guests:
    Wednesday
    Aug122015

    Take it Slow, Boss

    6:05:00 A.M. – The I-Man begins by telling us he needs to get a Texas Drivers’ License.  He follows the Google Map to the Department of Motor Vehicles…and when the App says “Destination is on the right”, he sees it, and pulls into the parking lot; simultaneously cutting off the car behind him…which also pulls into the parking lot.  Turns out it’s a big ol’ woman…who works at the Texas DMV.  He’ll be applying for his new license another time.

    HOW LONG UNTIL IT’S REVOKED?

    6:17:44 A.M. – The Boss tells us that Lis Wiehl will be phoning in for Blonde on Blonde this morning…which isn’t unusual, because she’s been phoning it in for years… (see what we did there).   Despite I-Man’s assessment of Lis’ work ethic, (maintaining she’s too lazy to come into the studio…and after all, it’s radio)  he says it’s fine if she calls rather than appear in person.  After all, it’s radio, and we have no idea what’s going on live, especially in the Brenham Studio.  “You don’t even know if I have any pants on.”  He says.   Yes we do.  You never wore them when you were here, Imus…why would you start wearing them now?

    STRANGELY, IT’S A GOOD LOOK FOR HIM…

    6:25:50 A.M. – Warner plays a clip of Jets Coach Todd Bowles, who weighs in on IK Enemkpali (try to say THAT name 5 times fast) breaking Geno Smith’s jaw in an altercation over 600 Dollars. Coach Bowles:  “You don’t walk up to somebody and punch him in the face.”   Wow.  You sure, Coach?  You’re really going out on a limb there.

    TO BE HONEST, WE’RE SURPRISED NOBODY TRIED TO PUNCH GENO SMITH IN THE MOUTH BEFORE THIS

    6:40:27 A.M. K.T. McFarland is on, and the I-Man proudly tells the story of adopted son Zach going to Pensacola for Navy Flight School, and mentions that he knows K.T.’s daughter is also in the Navy and wants to know if she’s as good looking as her mother.  “She’s a lot smarter and tougher” says Ms. McFarland.  So…in other words…no. 

    UM…K.T., NO OFFENSE…BUT YOU’RE MUCH PRETTIER

    7:05:17 A.M. – In the wake of the Geno Smith broken jaw story, the I-Man professes his admiration for the Jets Quarterback…because he sent cell phone pictures of his penis to a girl and…was unapologetic.

    GENO SMITH’S ‘DICK’ PICTURE

    7:17:34 A.M. – After criticizing Hillary Clinton for the Middle East rise of ISIS, Jeb Bush is judged by the I-Man to possibly  be “…dumber than his brother.”   Neil?

    THAT’D MAKE SOME COIN AT THE BOX OFFICE…

    7:36:06 A.M. BLONDE ON BLONDE, or, as we like to call it… WHY? WHAT DID WE DO?   Lis is calling from home…and you can hear she has no makeup on.

    LIS ‘AU NATURALE’ ON THE PHONE FOR B ON B

    7:41:16 A.M. – Weighing in on the Ben Affleck / Jennifer Garner situation, Deirdre maintains that one should not hire an attractive Caretaker for their children.   “You don’t want some hot babe changing your kids’ diapers.”  Ironic, especially considering the I-Man has a hot babe changing his…

    ALL DRY NOW…

    8:07:34 A.M. – Imus says he’s found a way to slow life down.  “I stop and think about everything I do.”  Which is pretty easy for him while he’s walking to the studio…because it takes a few hours. 

    TAKE IT SLOW, BOSS…TAKE IT SLOW…

    8:10:20 A.M. – Imus promos the upcoming appearance of NASCAR Legend Darrell Waltrip, and his 6th Annual Waltrip Brothers Charity Championship in October, where Travis Tritt will be the headliner.   The Boss wonders aloud, how far down the list you have to go before you get to Mr. Tritt…

    EVEN BILLY JOE SHAVER THINKS TRAVIS TRITT IS A FUNNY CHOICE…

     8:40:08 A.M. – The Aforementioned Darrell Waltrip phones in, and says that he turned on his TV and thought Imus wasn’t there.  We’d say he was just unaware that the I-Man is no longer on Fox Business…but Mr. Waltrip was sitting in front of his microwave at the time.


    VIDEO OF THE DAY

    TAXI’S JIM IGNATOWSKI’S CLASSIC DRIVERS LICENSE TEST

    (HE’LL HAVE AN EASIER TIME GETTING A TEXAS LICENSE THAN THE I-MAN WILL AFTER THIS MORNING…)

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X5XJ83PRJOU

    Tuesday
    Aug112015

    Bring the Crazy

    6:05:12 A.M. – Trump is, once again, the first topic of the day, and the I-Man weighs in with his trademark wisdom and perspective:  “He’s got big blubbery breastes and his wife’s a Russian Hooker.”

    WOW.  JUST…WOW.

    BUT AT LEAST SHE’S A CLASSY RUSSIAN HOOKER

    6:08:56 A.M. – There will be no Hollywood & Vine today, as, according to the Boss,  “Nobody’s around.”  However, we won’t be denied our Tuesday Morning Dose of the D-Woman.  Deirdre will be in to “Bring the Crazy.”   We smell a new segment.

    FROM THE PRODUCER OF ‘PSYCHOS’

    6:15:44 A.M. – Warner reports that the U.S. Rowing Team, practicing in Brazil, where the waters are quite polluted, have all come down with diarrhea. “Why don’t they just stay in the boat?” the I-Man inquires.  Well…he DOES have a point.

    6:17:34 A.M. – Imus tells Connell to do some news until he gets back…he’s literally just woken up, and needs a few minutes to get acclimated…otherwise he will, according to him, “Take a dump in the dishwasher.”

    YEAH, YOU’D BETTER GO FOR THE ‘ADVANCED FORMULA’

    6:40:27 A.M. Father Jonathan phones in, and the I-Man plays what, he says, is one of the Padre’s favorite songs:  Elton John’s “Don’t Let The Sun Go Down On Me.”  Homonyms being what they are, we’re not sure a Catholic Priest ought to be invoking an image of a young boy…well…you get the idea.

    GET BACK…HONKY CAT.

    6:43:27 A.M. Father Jonathan says that he never had a beer when he was a young man.  He does, however, chug the suds as an adult.

    “HEY…HEY!  YOU DON’ KNOW ME…I’M…I’M…I LOVE YOU MAN!”

    7:05:10 A.M. – The I-Man mentions that the film ‘Straight Outta Compton’, which opens Friday, was the movie that caused the ‘Artistic Differences’ with Suge Knight and Dr. Dre, resulting in Imus’ Best Buddy Mr. Knight, running over his friend in an attempt to escape the melee’.  He offers that ‘T-Money’, one of the Ranch Hands in Brenham, also happens to be from Compton.   Which sounds much more badass than Dallas. 

    STRAIGHT OUTTA BRENHAM

    7:15:37 A.M.  Imus informs us that Ben Affleck  had the ‘Nanny in Question’ who is causing his divorce in his Private Jet along with Tom Brady, who, apparently, let Christine take a selfie wearing his four Super Bowl Rings.  Which, of course, begs the question:  Who brings his four SuperBowl Rings with him on a plane?  Brady is married to Gisele Bundchen…WHO IS HE TRYING TO IMPRESS?  A F***KING NANNY?   She ain’t Mary Poppins! 

    NOT EVEN A SPOONFUL OF SUGAR WILL HELP THIS GO DOWN

    7:22:44 A.M. –  Warner plays a clip of JJ Watt saying that he and Vince Wilfork have a great relationship…like Big Brother/Little Brother.

    IN TRIBUTE TO THE LATE, GREAT, FRANK GIFFORD, WE ARE GOING TO DO IT IN THE BUTT

    7:42:06 A.M. – The Highly Anticipated ‘Bring the Crazy’ begins…and Deirdre, disappointingly, is measured and calm.  The I-Man asks her how she likes being a ‘Rodeo Mom’.  She LOVES it.  But then again, she loves being just a MOM…and a Wife...Caregiver…and, at some point here, pretty soon, a HOSPICE NURSE.

    DEIRDRE DOING THE LORD’S WORK

    7:45:16 A.M. – The D-Woman weighs in on the Trump situation, specifically, his comments at the debate about Rosie O’Donnell, in which he intimated that she was a ‘Fat Pig’.  Deirdre says that the incident where Rosie supposedly ‘Started’ the Feud, was her responding in a humorous way to Trump’s decision not to fire  Miss USA, Tara Conner, over Drug Abuse.   We don’t think Mr. Trump is about to change his position on ‘The Queen of Nice’. 

    “WHO’S DOING THE SQUEALING?  SOMEBODY’S  DOING THE SQUEALING…”

    8:07:34 A.M. – It’s been almost 24 Hours since Gunz has been dumped on.  Imus rhetorically asks why the G-Man expends so much effort and energy on his hair, remarking that the boy got enough hair products to start his own Salon. The Dim Lad says it’s in order to ‘Get Laid’.   He couldn’t get laid if he had a fistful of Hundred Dollar Bills and FABIO’S hair.

    NOT EVEN THEN…

    8:10:11 A.M. – The I-Man muses as to how much time Gunz spends getting ready to go out in public each morning.  “Can you imagine what he looks like before he gets himself together in the morning?”

    MICHAEL GUNZELMAN BEFORE  

    MICHAEL GUNZELMAN AFTER

    THE TRANSFORMATION IS NOTHING SHORT OF MAGIC

    8:17:44 A.M. – Warner plays a Rex Ryan clip, prompting the I-Man to ask if he’s “…still sucking toes.”   Warner says that Coach Ryan is “…in Buffalo now.”   Imus observes, “So he’ll be sucking on them FROZEN toes.”

    REX ENJOYING A ‘TOESICLE’

    8:39:43 A.M. – Nationally Syndicated Talk Show Host, and D-Woman Fave, Mark Levin is on to promote his new book “PLUNDER AND DECEIT”.   We’re not sure…but we’re kinda getting the impression that he’s not all that fond of the President.

    ANOTHER BESTSELLER FOR SURE…

    VIDEO OF THE DAY

    DOM DELUISE SHOWS HOW TO REALLY

    “BRING THE CRAZY”

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mitF1kpMbvg 

    Monday
    Aug102015

    Lovers & Friends

    6:06:12 A.M. – The I-Man tells us that Wyatt kicked some ass at a couple rodeos this past weekend, despite the fact that the competitors try to psyche him out by saying icky stuff to him.  Which, of course, the Wy-Man is impervious to, because he can give better than he takes… “We found your wife’s panties in the barn, and one of the horses has a sore penis.”   Oh…snap.

    “OWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!”

    6:08:56 A.M. – Connell reports the passing of Pro Football Hall O’ Famer, Frank Gifford…which leads to Bernard to remind us that he had an affair with a Stewardess, and they had ‘Sex in the Butt.’   Frank Gifford, that is…not Bernie.  Although we’re not sure Bernie doesn’t like it ‘In the Butt’. 

    6:15:44 A.M. – At the request of Wendy, Delbert McClinton’s wife, Imus reluctantly agrees to sit for an interview for a story about his favorite singer.   The writer posits, “You said somewhere that you love Delbert.  What did you mean by that?”   To which, the I-Man responds, “We’re gay lovers.”   She says “Seriously, what did you mean by that?”  To which, Imus responds “You’re not…offended by that, are you?”

    THE LOVE THAT DARE NOT SPEAK ITS NAME…

    6:25:30 A.M. Warner has a story about a fan who threw a Home Run Ball back onto the field…hitting Yankee Outfielder Brett Gardner in the back of the head.    Technically, Gardner should have taken a base.  Except that the Yankees weren’t at Bat at the time. 

    “OWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!”

    6:41:22 A.M. – Bo Dietl is on, and maintains that “Megyn Kelly was a little hard on Trump.”  The I-Man tries to bait Bo into attacking Fox, but SuperCop Dietl doesn’t take the bait.  He says that if The Donald is going to be our President, he has to answer some Tough Questions.   We have a suggestion:  Two trains leave the station at the same time, one heading west and the other east. The westbound train travels at 85 miles per hour. The eastbound train travels at 95 miles per hour. How long will it take for the two trains to be 252 miles apart?   Answer that one, Donald. 

    A GOOD U.S. PRESIDENT MUST KNOW HIS ALGEBRA

    7:05:10 A.M. – Heavy is the head that wears the crown.  The I-Man bought a Mophie, but it did not come with a USB charger.  Now he has to deal with that.  You know, sometimes it feels like there really isn’t a God.

    SO…HOW IS HE SUPPOSED TO CHARGE THE F**KING THING?

    7:12:24 A.M. – There is a phone ringing.  The I-Man wants to know, “Which one of you idiots’ phone is ringing.”  “I have twenty bucks that says it’s yours, I-Man.” Connell challenges.  “Where do I send you the 20 Dollars?” The Boss asks.

    IT’S TYLER.  IT CAN’T BE GOOD.

    7:14:28 A.M. – Apparently, it’s Tyler on the phone.  He’s one of the Ranch Hands, who is driving one of the I-Man’s trucks to work.  He texts, “I had to swerve…” A word that would indicate this is not going to be a positive text.  “…to avoid a herd of hogs…and I clipped one.  And now I have a flat tire.”   So what do we do now?   Well…two things.  Fix the flat, and take that hog wee wee wee all the way to the smokehouse.  There’s some bacon coming!

    WHO SAYS PIGS CAN’T FLY?

    7:19:09 A.M. – “I have to go wake Wyatt, Warner.  So do Sports until I get back.”  Until he gets back?  He’s walking?  Warner better have a 90 minute report…

    THIS COULD TAKE AWHILE…

    7:42:16 A.M. – Vinnie from Queens begins with a question about the Late, Great, Frank Gifford… “Why do you think he didn’t commit suicide earlier?”  Too soon?  Apparently not.

    NO.  JUST…NO.

    8:07:34 A.M. – Warner, in a tribute to his old friend Frank Gifford says… “He could do anything on the field.”  Oh, REALLY, Warner?  Could he make a rock so heavy even he could not lift it?  Well?  Could he?  So…he really COULDN’T do ANYTHING.  Could he?

    “FOR MY NEXT TRICK, I’LL PULL THIS RABBIT OUT OF MY BUTT.”

    8:15:11 A.M. – The I-Man realizes that he’s arguing with himself again.  “I gotta stop arguing with myself.  Remember when I used to argue with myself?  No, I don’t.  Yes you do. NO…I DON’T.”

    WE’RE CURIOUS AS TO WHO WINS THE ARGUMENT

    8:17:43 A.M. – The I-Man takes a survey among the staff about the Republican Candidates.  “Would you let your kid go camping with him?”  It might not be all that scientific a poll, but it’s pretty revealing.

    UM…THAT’S SCARIER THAN A GHOST STORY

    8:19:43 A.M. – Warner begins his Sports Report, but he forgets to turn his microphone.  The I-Man tells Warner he might want to think about turning it on, but…to be honest, we’re more concerned that Warner pull his pants up. 

    NOT EXACTLY ‘BROADCAST READY’

    8:42:09 A.M. – Linda Fairstein is on to discuss her new book, “THE DEVIL’S BRIDGE”, and the I-Man takes an interest in the tome, only because he finds out that he’s mentioned in it, so he misses most of what Ms. Fairstein says, as he spends most of the time during the interview flipping through the pages to see where it is.   It’s Page 105, by the way.  

    A GUARANTEED BESTSELLER

    8:44:48 A.M. –  Ms. Fairstein maintains that Donald Trump will not fare well due to his comments about Megyn Kelly…for she believes that he DID, indeed, make a ‘Menstrual’ joke.  Which we, by the way, condemn…as we think wearing blackface is a sure-fire way to ruin anybody’s political aspirations.

    OH…IT WASN’T A ‘MINSTREL’  JOKE…SORRY, MR. JOLSON.

     VIDEO OF THE DAY

    THE VOX POPULI WEIGHS IN ON TRUMP

    AND THEY’RE NOT HAPPY WITH MEGYN KELLY

     

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZqgnaWuaaQ4

    Friday
    Aug072015

    Special Post-Debate Edition

    6:05:22 A.M. – We are all suffering from ‘Debate Hangover’.  Usually, the cure for a Hangover is to have a little bit of the ‘Hair of the Dog That Bit You.’  But after the coifs displayed onstage between Trump and Rand Paul, we think we’ll just take an aspirin and eat some fatty food.

    WE’D HAVE TO SAY BOTH OF THESE WOULD QUALIFY AS…DOG HAIR

    6:15:44 A.M. – The consensus appears to be that Donald Trump was the one who emerged the winner, according to a poll on Drudge that has the Bat-Sh*t Billionaire ahead by over 50%.   And some people say there’s no God.

    “…FANTASTIC.  REALLY.  FIRST RATE.  AND EVERYONE KNOWS IT.”

    6:40:27 A.M. Juan Williams has phoned in, and he is of the opinion that Marco Rubio did pretty well last night.  Jeb Bush…not so much.  He was glad the moderators let the Ron Paul/Chris Christie exchange to go forward, as it was one of the more exciting moments of the night.  He does admit that it was the Donald Trump Show…although, in the Early Bird Special tonight, he thought that Carly Fiorina was the clear winner.  She looked stiff in the arena, but on TV, she came alive. Kind of like Supergirl.

    IRONICALLY, CARLY IS HILLARY’S KRYPTONITE

    7:18:36 A.M. – Bernard, who is hosting the program this morning, has truly taken charge of the proceedings.  “I will conclude this Sports Report” he tells Warner, after Warner plays one of his signature music cuts.  “So it is written, so it shall be done.”  The Book of Bernie, 3.16.

    MCGUIRK. ‘SELF-PORTRAIT’ CIR. 1438

    7:30:06 A.M. – A clip is played of Donald Trump from last night, where he admits giving money to politicians, only so he could hit them up for favors later on…which, for some reason, seemed to be a surprise to everybody on the dais, as if he had invented this political practice.  It was, in fact, Don Corleone who invented it. When challenged by Rand Paul that he had contributed to Hillary Clinton’s Foundation, he said it was to get her to come to his wedding.  Paying people to show up at your party…which was a practice started by Gunz on his 10th Birthday.

    “MAYBE THEY GOT STUCK IN TRAFFIC…”

    7:38:57 A.M. – Monica Crowley is on...the phone, unfortunately.  We always like it when she’s in studio because…well, the girl is what you might call… ‘Tappable’.  She says that last night she liked Marco Rubio…she also likes Marco Polo…not the Explorer, but the game kids play in the pool.  She’s also fond of Top Gigio.  She likes anybody who’s first and last names end in the same vowels. 

    “MONICA…KISS ME GOODNIGHT!”

    7:40:57 A.M. – Monica was a little annoyed by Donald Trump’ complaining about the Fox Moderators.  “You can’t be whining about the moderators.”  To which Trump would respond… “Who’s doing the whining?  SOMEBODY’S doing the whining!”  She also described the struggling Jeb Bush as an intellectual… “An Egghead”  (Her words)  We would never think to link the name ‘Bush’ with the term ‘Egghead’.  Albert Einstein…Egghead.  Stephen Hawking…Egghead.   Jeb Bush…likes Huevos Rancheros.

    HEY! WAIT A SECOND!  JEB’S NO EGGHEAD!

    ALTHOUGH, THAT’S A GAMESHOW WE’D WATCH

    8:07:34 A.M. – Apparently, Trump was on Twitter until the wee hours of the morning, obviously, pumped up after his performance at the debate.   One Tweet maintained that “I really enjoyed the debate tonight even though the @FoxNews trio, especially @megynkelly, was not very good or professional.”  He doubled down with Wow@MegynKelly really bombed tonight.  But the person who took the most heat was…Frank Luntz:  “Frank Luntz is a low class slob… a clown.”  Which is clearly not true.  He’s middle class.

    HE’S NOT A CLOWN.  AND HERE’S PROOF THAT THAT HAIR IS PERFECTLY NATURAL

    8:39:43 A.M. VINNIE FROM QUEENS : A 2ND edition, ‘Psychos’ style…and among the topics are female assistant coaches…one in the NBA and one in the NFL.  The Question is…can a woman be a HEAD coach of a professional sports team?  The panel all agree that it will probably happen in Basketball first.  However, if Caitlyn Jenner wants to get into coaching, she could probably have great success in ANY professional sport…consider she has some first ‘hand’ experience with…balls.

    NOW SHE’S GOT WHAT YOU MIGHT CALL A ‘PENALTY BOX’

    8:40:09 A.M. – Floyd Mayweather’s response to Ronda Rousey’s ‘ESPYS’ jab…in which she suggested she was one woman he could not beat.  “Well when she can make 300 Million dollars in about 36 minutes, then she can talk.”  The boys are asked ‘How Long Would Floyd Mayweather Last in a Cage With Ronda Rousey?’  Warner predicts that Floyd would knock her out.  He’s actually taking this question seriously...he says that back when Wrestler Antonio Inoki went against Muhammad Ali, all he could do was lie on his back on the canvas and kick at the Champ.  Warner doesn’t realize that A- Ronda Rousey is a Mixed Martial Arts Fighter, and so could kick a plethora of ass in a myriad of ways.  And B- Professional Wrestling isn’t real.

    “THAT’S FOR PEARL HARBOR…”

    THAT’S FOR BEING A BITCH!”

    VIDEO OF THE DAY

    TWO OF THE MORE EXCITING MOMENTS OF BLOOD SPORT FROM LAST NIGHT’S DEBATE:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kUMfJt7LU8o 

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A3kdJghNSL0 

    WE GET THE FEELING WE’VE SEEN THIS TABLEAU BEFORE…

    OH.  YEAH.  THAT’S RIGHT…WE HAVE.

    Thursday
    Aug062015

    The Deirdre Detonation

    6:05:17A.M. – The I-Man assigns Connell the task of texting him during the debate, as he will be in Glen Rose Texas tonight, at a Rodeo with Wyatt and the D-Woman.  He might just regret that idea...

    THIS WILL BE MORE FUN THAN THE ACTUAL DEBATE...

    6:12:56 A.M. – Tonight will also be Jon Stewart’s final as host of The Daily Show, and will be succeeded by South African Comedian Trevor Noah, who, the I-Man predicts, will be “A Guaranteed Disaster.”   With Stewart gone, where are we going to get our News?  Connell? 

    HE COULDN’T BE ANY WORSE THAN THIS TREVOR NOAH DUDE.

    6:15:44 A.M. – Today is Ali’s first day as Associate Producer, Personal Assistant and Office Manager of Imus in the Morning World Headquarters.  We offer her the following advice:  ‘Be afraid.  Be VERY afraid.’ 

    MEGHAN HURLBUT:  “SCREW YOU GUYS...I’M GOING HOME...”

    6:40:27 A.M. Liz McDonald has phoned in, and because Ali has already screwed up, (Well, that didn’t take long…) as she neglected to send the I-Man the Bio Sheets for the guests, he has no idea what she does, and why she’s on the program this morning.  She’s only been on a thousand times.  Maybe it’s because the past few times she’s been promoting her book ‘SKIRTING HERESY: THE LIFE AND TIMES OF MARGERY KEMP.’ … which is not exactly at the top of our Summer Reading List.  She says she’s written a screenplay.  Good.  We’ll wait for the movie, then.

    LIZ MCDONALD...A STRIKING RESEMBLANCE TO MARGERY KEMP

    7:15:37 A.M. – In the news, there’s a story about a 92 year old woman, who’s never voted in her life, who has announced that she will, indeed vote in the Next Presidential Election…for Donald Trump.  Which is…optimistic…to say the least.  Not that Mr. Trump won’t get the nomination…but that this old bag thinks she’ll still be around to pull the lever.

    “I DON’T LIKE THE F#@%ING MEXICANS EITHER.”

    7:16:32 A.M. – The I-Man texts T-Money to see if he’s brought the fans to Glen Rose to cool the horse stalls.  ‘T’ has gone ahead to take Marconi, Tupelo and Red Cloud, Wyatt’s roping horses, to the rodeo.  And if they like that, he’s going to take them to the movies tomorrow night. 

    THEN, AFTER THE MOVIE WAS OVER, THEY SNUCK INTO ANOTHER THEATER IN THE MULTIPLEX TO SEE MISSION IMPOSSIBLE

    7:32:06 A.M. PSYCHOS II sets the bar so impossibly high, it’s difficult to believe that it will ever reach the level of insanity achieved this morning.  It begins with the I-Man complaining that his neck hurts, because, apparently, only 2 of the 6 pillows on the bed are MyPillows. 

    ‘DONNIE’, AND HIS LITTLE PALS, THE VERMONT TEDDY BEARS HE CALLS  ‘BRUCIE’ AND ‘MURRAY’ ARE READY TO GO ‘BA BA BLANKIE’

    7:38:09 A.M. – Curtis Sliwa gets Apoplectic over “Your Mayor, Alan B. Colmes… ‘Comrade’ De Blasio” who isn’t doing anything to address the problems of the Homeless.  It’s clear Curtis won’t be campaigning for Bill’s Re-Election.  He advises Hizzoner to stop “Smoking the Spliffs on the Back Porch.”   If Curtis keeps it up, we’re going to have to START smoking them.

    EDVARD MUNCH PREDICTED CURTIS’ OUTBURST

    AT LEAST THAT’S WHAT WE SAW AFTER WE SPARKED UP A FATTIE OF SOME BITCHIN’ ‘GHOST TRAIN #3’ KUSH

    7:40:16 A.M. – Alan Colmes is up next, and accuses the Republicans and Conservatives of editing the notorious ‘Planned Parenthood Video’… which is how it all began… What followed was as volatile as a Supernova.  Deirdre achieved Full On, In The Red Zone, China Syndrome, Meltdown Status.

    ALAN COLMES BEFORE THE DEIRDRE DETONATION

    AND AFTER THE DEIRDRE DETONATION

    7:44:35 A.M. – The girl can’t contain herself.  She is so passionate about her position, and is making her point in such an animated, intensely ferocious way that Ronda Rousey wouldn’t mess with her at this point.  She calls Alan a ‘Baby Killer’.  We’re not so sure we agree…but one thing’s for sure…we’re not going to disagree with her.  Not now.  Not ever.

    NOW, THIS IS A BABY KILLER.

    (BUT WE’RE NOT GOING TO TELL DEIRDRE THAT)

    7:45:09 A.M. – After putting her mouth where her…well, mouth is…and walking the talk and talking the walk, Deirdre has made a case that is difficult to argue with…unless, of course, you’re Alan Colmes, who, we suspect, actually feels the same way about the subject as Deirdre does…and is just poking her with a stick to get a reaction, because it makes for great radio.  “I made Deirdre’s head explode?” he says… “…then my work is done here.” 

    THE IMUS’ AT A GALA FUNDRAISER FOR ALAN COLMES’ CHARITY,

     ‘LIBERAL LOSER BABYKILLERS OF AMERICA’

    8:07:34 A.M. – Former Mayor of New York City, Rudolph Giuliani is slated to be the 8:30 Guest…no doubt to comment on Curtis’ least favorite mayor, but…it appears that he cannot make his confirmed time slot.  “He better not be better dealing us…”the I-Man pronounces. 

    FROM WEBSTER’S  ‘PLAYGROUND SLANG & RECESS IDIOMS DICTIONARY’

    8:11:22 A.M. –  The I-Man commands Matt Meany, one of our ABC Researchers, to monitor all the…well, monitors in the newsroom, to see which show Giuliani has ‘Flat-Left’ us for.   We speculate on which program could possibly be more important than ours.

    IT COULDN’T BE THIS…OR COULD IT?

    8:16: 43 A.M. – Bernard is as upset with Mayor DeBlasio as Curtis is…especially because he missed the Press Conference about the Homeless and Legionnaires disease…to hang with Louis C.K.

    “SO…HERE’S WHAT I’M THINKING…YOU GIVE INFECT THE HOMELESS…WITH LEGIONNAIRES DISEASE…”

    8:24:09 A.M. – The word comes down the line that Mayor Giuliani can, indeed, join us at his pre-appointed time.  All is forgiven.  Which is something Bernard can’t seem to do when Connell reports that today is the 70th Anniversary of the Bombing of Hiroshima.  Bernie contends that Connell is being somber about the event…when, in fact, we killed 140 thousand people to save many more hundreds of thousands, perhaps millions, of Americans.  He points out that they were our Enemies in World War Two, and THEY STARTED IT.  And, besides that… ‘Look what they did to the China…’ referring of course, the rape, humiliation and torture they subjected the Chinese people during the siege at Nanking.  “Yeah, that was an icky deal…” Imus comments.  Way to put it in perspective, Boss.  Of course, this discussion has made Mayor Giuliani’s appearance a moot point.  There’s no time for him now. 

    YEAH, THESE GUYS LOOK LIKE THEY’RE WILLING TO LET BYGONES BE BYGONES

     8:36:12 A.M. – Now Giuliani can’t do it again…and we find out why.  He’s on CNN.  OH NO HE DI-INT.

      

    BREAKING NEWS: THIS JUST IN...

    VIDEO OF THE DAY

    SPEAKING OF HORSES...AND THE MOVIES

    HERE IS REX PETERSON

    HOLLYWOOD HORSE TRAINER

     

    “I’VE DONE A VARIETY OF THINGS WITH HORSES.”

    OH, WE BET YOU HAVE, REX...WE BET YOU HAVE. 


    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=holFimz2MK0